Pillaging, mutilating, bag toss highlight traditional Columbus Day celebrations
Trending: Jacob Wohl to hold press conference at NBA game where Ellen and George W Bush present to allege Hunter Biden ran sex club for furries in Ukraine during MLB playoff watch party, or something. Beto confirms.
Twitter furious Ellen DeGeneres seen quail hunting with good friend Dick Cheney
NBA apologizes to Galactic Empire after anti-Vader tweets surface
Report: Pumpkin spice babies could save planet through fall
Beto taking the longest shit on Instagram story
Man’s decision to use plastic straw speeds up end of the world 5 years