By Amelia Hamilton
Welcome to Are We Doomed? The weekly column in which I take a look at recent news and try to determine if it’s all downhill from here.
Share Joy
We hear so many negative stories right now that we can forget that things are honestly OK. This reporter asked people to share something good, and the replies will make you feel better about the world.
Verdict: We’re not doomed at all, just look at the replies and you’ll see.
Ma’am, this is a school
Apparently this needs to be said – WAP IS NOT APPROPRIATE CURRICULUM.
Verdict: As schools decline, so does society. So anyway yeah we’re doomed.
But can I pet them?
Two new species of mammals have been discovered! Please say I can pet them.
Verdict: The world is a wonderful place with so much still to discover. It’s not doomed at all.
Do not pet
This is an extremely big alligator.
Verdict: We just might be doomed, actually.
Predictions of doom
Apparently, if one looks at patterns in history, doom can be predicted. If this is true, we are really in for it. It’s just gonna get worse from here.
Verdict: I guess we’ll have to wait and see.
In the final analysis… There are giant alligators and horrifying things happening at schools (and maybe it’s just going to get worse) but there are also all kinds of wonderful things like very cute mammals. I think we’re going to be ok if we would only focus on what’s wonderful.
Want to know if your situation is doomed? Write and tell me about what’s going on and I’ll let you know what you can do to keep the doom at bay (unless it’s just totally doomed, in which case I’ll tell you that, too). You can tweet me @ameliahammy using #AskAmHam, message me through my Facebook page, or e-mail editorial@velvethamster.com. Let me help!