I watched in dismay last night as social media came together to mock a California congressman – a public servant – who is definitely not me for appearing to pass gas on live television. While I understand that bathroom humor can be funny for some, keep in mind that it is likely deeply embarrassing to the public servant in question.

MSNBC made it clear that the sound was not an enormous toot but, rather, the sound of a mug being dragged across a desk, which in no way sounds the same. The public needs to take this explanation at face value and not embarrass this man, who I’m sure is an exemplary human being.

As a completely different politician from California, I would like to thank the Velvet Hamster for not reporting on such salacious gossip about a handsome man who should be president. In this age of fake news and scurrilous accusations run amok, you are the only outlet we can trust to be fair professional.

With Gratitude,

Derek Ballwell