A brave Democratic strategist stepped up to prevent a local rioter from destroying a building late Monday night, by throwing himself in front of him and reminding him to think of the electoral consequences.
The strategist jumped into action concerned about what voters might think if businesses are burned down and looted and people’s livelihoods are destroyed. Initial polling indicated Republicans could benefit in November if left-leaning groups continue to riot and Democrats say little to nothing, so it was a must for the strategist to step up and let people know.
“Stop! Think of the election!” he yelled jumping in front of a masked man about to throw a molotov cocktail. “Do you realize if you burn down that bakery or smash up that car dealership you’re going to be hurting people… good people… people running for office in November?”
Reporters on the scene have different interpretations of the events that followed, but most saw the rioter shrug and burn down a barber shop. The strategist was last heard pleading “why won’t anyone think of the Democrats!?”