Conservative talking head turned gymnast Charlie Kirk’s pursuit for the gold medal in gymnastics was derailed Wednesday, as his massive forehead weighed him down while he tried to stick a landing.
Kirk, who as of today was an expert in Olympic sports and a huge gymnastics fan, headed to the Tokyo games to prove his toughness. While it started out somewhat promising, his obscenely large forehead proved to be detrimental as he couldn’t balance himself and fell hard on the balance beam. Kirk was booed loudly, but kept his spirits high.
“At least I’m not a selfish sociopathic snowflake,” Kirk told Fox News after his event. “I’m tough, unlike the generation I’m in. I mean, look at my forehead. It’s not weak.”
Kirk is expected to retire from gymnastics and go back to doing whatever it is he does.