Frustrated with the amount of attention on some icky virus, former royals Harry and Meghan have announced that they’re going to start a new nonprofit while having no idea what it does.
The couple has not announced what their new organization, Archewell, will actually do aside from get them back in the headlines as the world follows an unprecedented crisis.
“Like the brothers and sisters-in-law of every monarch, we were tired of all of the press attention that just happened organically with us doing absolutely nothing to court it,” Meghan said in a press release that she sent to everyone she could find, including Velvet Hamster. “We moved to Canada to get away from it, but then people stopped reporting on us like we don’t even matter. We relocated to Los Angeles in the middle of a quarantine sure that, if the move itself didn’t make headlines, we would be able to announce that we have the virus and people won’t leave us alone about it. But then Harry’s dad got it instead just to steal our thunder so, anyway, here’s Archewell. We will tell you later what it does in a later news cycle, but leave us alone until then we’re so tired of being overlooked because nobody actually cares about the brother of the second-in-line and his wife.”
Velvet Hamster will update once it has become clear if their organization does anything but issue press releases during major global events.